Experiential Life Community

Simple Holiday Traditions Your Neurodivergent Child Will Love

Christy — Wed, 27 Nov 2024 22:38:52 +0000

Why I Broke Our Holiday Traditions and Started New Ones Instead

Holidays for neurodivergent kids can be rough… Am I right? The change in routine, the amount of socializing, and all the new/different sensory experiences are a LOT. And there’s so much pressure to keep alive the traditions passed down from generation to generation.

But what do we do when holiday traditions trigger our neurodivergent kids?

I’ll never forget the last time I spent a holiday with our extended family. My mom’s side of the family is HUGE… Like more than 60 people huge. When the whole family gets together it is pure chaos, a ton of food, a lot of laughter, no room to sit, and LOUD, like really really loud.

We don’t live close to most of our family members, and it takes between 1 and 2 hours to get to where they live. And while our family loves a good road trip, it makes for a long day – especially considering the above.

So, there we are, walking into a townhouse FULL to the brim of ALL the people. Asking for hugs, taking our coats, dodging the open door, throwing a football over our head. Again…pure chaos.

And there was a time I absolutely loved the chaos.

But not this time. Not when I knew immediately that I made a big mistake. Because this is C’s version of a nightmare. People he doesn’t really know, asking a ton of questions, commenting on how much he’s grown, wanting to touch and hug him… So much noise, stifling heat – because ALL the people – no room to move and no place to escape.

We pushed our way through the living room, into the kitchen, where we found a set of steps to the basement. It was like a sweet refuge for my boy. Less noise, less light, less touch, less smell… And he could see who was coming at him. He could attempt to control the environment.

The family wanted to know why we weren’t being social. They didn’t understand that it wasn’t a choice – it was a need. We needed to be away from everyone so C could feel and be safe.

And that’s when I realized that the feelings of my extended family members didn’t supersede my son’s needs.

That was the last time we spent the holidays with that side of the family. Not because we are jerks or don’t want to be around them. It’s because we can’t be around ALL of them ALL at once.

It doesn’t work for our family.

And realizing that I had a choice, that our family chooses our family traditions – that I didn’t need to hold on to something that doesn’t work for us simply because everyone expected it – well it was freeing AND empowering.

And here’s the thing…

If you feel weighed down by the expectations of others during the holiday season, maybe you don’t have to. Maybe you can also let their expectations and old traditions go – and create new traditions that work better for your family.

We decided to prioritize fun over everything else.

We don’t get dressed up for the holidays anymore. ALL holidays are officially PJ days in our home.

We stay home for ALL holidays. And we invite family and friends who respect the accommodations C needs to make holidays enjoyable.

We don’t force anybody to do anything they can’t or don’t want to do.

Want to eat at the kitchen island? Cool.
Want to get up after you’re done eating – even if no one else is done? That’s totally fine.
Want to have chicken nuggets and french fries instead of the fancy meal? That’s super easy to throw in the oven.
Prefer dessert over veggies? Me too!

This goes for anyone who visits our home for the holidays. If it’s going to be fun, it’s gotta be flexible. If it’s going to be flexible, we’ve gotta know what we can do to help make it happen.

Want to know something?

We are ALL so much happier staying home, in our pajamas, eating the food we like, where and when we want. We are free to be ourselves and we are surrounded by people who prefer us to be who we are, rather than who they expect us to be

AND, if any of this resonates, please share this article with your network and subscribe to the newsletter to get instant access to future articles, weekly advocacy tips, exclusive event invites, and news you can use.

The post Simple Holiday Traditions Your Neurodivergent Child Will Love appeared first on Experiential Life Community.

Announcing Experiential Life – Raising Your Neurodivergent Kid With Confidence

Christy — Mon, 25 Nov 2024 00:20:04 +0000

Raising a Neurodivergent Kid is an Emotional Rollercoaster

The day the pediatrician said, “you should have your son evaluated for autism,” life changed.

You remember that feeling, right? The, “what does this mean, what do I do, how will I do it?”

I followed my gut and immediately jumped into research mode. I wanted to know everything, connect to other parents who might mentor me on this journey, and find the best doctors to help him.

I didn’t know how hard making that happen would be.

Riding the Highs and Bracing for the Lows

The feelings of overwhelm and anxiety still fester, even more than a decade later.

Everything feels like two steps forward followed by two steps back. Whether it’s celebrating milestones like reading, counting money, or making new friends – or – on the flip side, finding a great provider who suddenly drops your insurance, getting a new diagnosis, or coordinating services, supports, appointments, and life.

The highs and lows can be extreme and send my stomach plummeting just like it does when I ride a rollercoaster.

And much like a rollercoaster, the wait (for pretty much everything I need to support my autistic son) can be long. The anticipation builds as I approach the front of the line, and my expectations can either be exceeded or leave me feeling defeated.

And frankly, I am over the whole metaphorical and yet equally emotional ride. It’s time for a change, and I think you’ll absolutely love what I have planned.

Parents and Caregivers Raising Neurodivergent Kids Need Support

The feelings of overwhelm, loneliness, frustration, and hope resonate with every single parent and caregiver I meet.

When you look at studies on mental health for parents and caregivers of neurodivergent kids, the findings aren’t great. And just about every research paper I’ve read on the subject recommends parent support and better access to resources and information as a way to alleviate some of the stress that accompanies caring for a neurodivergent child.

I don’t know about you, but finding parent support, figuring out where to get information and resources (never mind finding the time or trying to make sense of it all) is NOT an easy task. In fact, it made me feel even more hopeless.

What, do I just run around telling every person I know that my kid just got a diagnosis – hoping that it will lead to parent support??? Seriously, where’s the manual?

I got so frustrated, I built what I needed, knowing that every time I spoke to a parent, they needed it too.

And, here we are, a decade after building the first solution, and not much change in supporting parents is happening on a large scale.

It’s time we fix that.

What if you could access all the information you need to support your neurodivergent child - from the palm of your hand?

The Experiential Life App brings together parents and caregivers raising neurodivergent kids through community, webinars, parent support, and downloadable resources, all contained in a convenient app on your favorite device.

It’s perfect for parents and caregivers who:

Crave community, and

Need help:

navigating the education and healthcare systems,
communicating with all the providers and professionals, and
finding trustworthy information and resources.

It’s the solution I wanted and needed when we first got the diagnosis. It’s the solution that would have saved me time, energy, frustration, and confusion. It’s the solution that we needed yesterday.

Welcome to the Community for Parents and Caregivers Raising Neurodivergent Kids

If you, like me, are looking for an easier way to navigate the systems that support your neurodivergent kid, want to meet other parents and caregivers who are passionate advocates like you, and want access to easy to find and understand information and resources, you are in the right place!

This community empowers parents and caregivers to support their neurodivergent kid(s) with confidence through:

Interactive webinars that you can binge watch at a time most convenient for you,

Downloadable resources and information from the most trustworthy professionals,

Parent support meet-ups, so you don’t have to awkwardly ask strangers where to find your people,

Ask Me Anything sessions with yours truly. I’ve spent over a decade in healthcare and disability advocacy. I founded a nonprofit, accepted insurance as a provider of disability services, served as the Director of Operations for a State Council on Developmental Disabilities, and consulted with organizations and agencies working to improve life for neurodivergent people. I’m your new “insider” BFF.

AND, if any of this resonates, please share this article with your network and subscribe to the newsletter to get instant access to future articles, updates about the app, and invitations to future events, like parent support groups.

The post Announcing Experiential Life – Raising Your Neurodivergent Kid With Confidence appeared first on Experiential Life Community.